She was impertinent and fat, gorged after a stolen meal.  I raised my palm to slap her, and…

The Hunt For Red Mosquitos 3

I guess mosquito season is back.  I don’t know how they find their way in, or which hidden cesspool is their breeding lair.  But this morning after my shower, I dried off my neck and felt I had mump (plural would be both sides of my neck).  Instantly I broke down the possibilities:

1. a rare medical disease that begins to manifest as a swelling on one side of the neck (0.001% chance)


2. a mosquito bite (99.999% chance)

So I began to search.  Sometimes at night I will spend 20 minutes hunting down a single mosquito in my bedroom.  But this morning I started at the scene of the crime and immediately saw her lounging on the wall, less than a foot from my pillow.  She was huge — I mean FAT — and obviously in no condition to make a fast getaway.  So I didn’t even bother to summon my Qi and powerup for a fast strike.  I just raised my hand and lightly slapped.  Rewarded with a big bright red splotch on my sage green wall.

Today I hardly noticed the bite at all.  I think that if you must get bitten, the neck is probably the best place.  I don’t know why it’s so non-itchy.  Maybe that’s why vampires go for the neck too.  They might be considerate creatures who just need to feed while trying to inconvenience us as little as possible.

Which Christian Theologian Are You?

As seen on pablote’s site (trying not to incur the wrath of joyosity)

Intermediate Chef Skills Question #1

Describe the difference between Kari-Out and Kikkoman soy sauces.

answer provided in first comment.

Goodbye to Friends

It’s over. The end of another era in sitcoms, the passing of a dynasty. I wonder what made it so successful. Was it the actors, the scriptwriters, or some undefined synergy and chemistry in the group? The way they all had their individual quirks and foibles yet loved each other as family? The draw of community in the lonely city is certainly appealing to our young adult crowd. Conflict, forgiveness, reconciliation — all the hallmarks of a good community.

Or was it the keen insight of the writers who put their finger exactly on the differences between men and women (another popular topic for our crowd)? Joey doesn’t understand the most basic of jokes and social subtleties but gets his roommate mumbling, “I’m stuck in an ATM vestible with Jill Goodacre!”

Introduce dream sequence with Highrockers as Friends:

• Joey… studly, gregarious, good with the ladies… Ryan Yi


• Monica… cooks, takes charge, well-organized… Youngson Kim


• Phoebe… a different perspective on life… Jessie Chen


• Chandler… funny, self-deprecating, sarcastic… Doug Lee


• Rachel… attractive shopper… Helen Hong


• Hmm, who would that leave for Ross?
  
  

P.S. Please support Ross by coming out to the Highrock Missions Yard Sale tomorrow from 9AM to 1:30PM at the church, downstairs. See you all there!

Lesson from Building a House

The biggest lesson I’ve learned from the loft project is that catalog product availability may vary.  Near the beginning of the project I picked out my appliances and built-in furniture.  Then the contractor started building up the framework, and I started placing orders.  Two months later, I have the following hold-ups because I assumed if it’s in the catalog, it’s available to buy.

1. IKEA FREDEN bathroom high cabinet vanity
   
   I can’t choose another vanity now because the plumbing has been run and the wallwork and lighting done to accomodate this specific unit.
   


2. GE WSM2420D Spacemaker Washer/Dryer Combo
   Again, the plumbing and wallwork were done for this washer/dryer.  It’s still advertised on www.sears.com, but if you place an order, you’ll get an email saying it’s out of stock and none available soon.  Grrr…  Fortunately, Sozio Appliances at the Concord rotary carries it, so it will only be a week delay.
   


3. GE CleanSteel GTL18JCPBS Refrigerator
   Home Depot has carried this for the past 6 months.  Last week I went in to buy it, and the salesman, being nice, gave me a 10% off any one purchase but usable only Thursday through Sunday.  So I went back Friday night to order the fridge and buy a bunch of other stuff (toilets, convection microwave, paint, etc…).  But there was a run on the fridges (maybe everyone else used their 10% coupon on it), so they are now out of stock.  No telling when the next batch comes in.  Meanwhile, my contractor is waiting for the appliances to come in so he can have the plumber hook everything up…

Loft Update

Today was a big day for me.  I got three deliveries: my rolling ladder, kitchen cabinet handles, and bathtub backsplash tiles (you can’t see them because they’re white-on-white, hahaha).  Tonight I enlisted some Highrockers to help me paint.  I think I’ll be painting every night for the next week or two…

Chinese and Fonts

This weekend I walked by a Chinese church I’d never seen before.  Out front it had a huge banner, maybe 20 feet across, with some saying printed in .

I think that is the ugliest banner font possible.  It looks like an Xtools editor while you’re composing a xanga entry, or maybe someone’s first PowerPoint slide.  But I’ve seen this font used for a lot of Chinese church media: websites, bulletins, signs, etc…  It makes me cringe and want to organize a group of Chinese-American graphic artists to help these style-blind churches.

The ironic thing is: the Chinese historically have written in calligraphy so you’d think we’d be sensitive to font attractiveness.  Maybe the Cultural Revolution or moving to the U.S. has drained it away from us.  I think it’s the former.  When I see printed Chinese text on newspapers and food packaging, most of those fronts are pretty ugly, too.  And I don’t even read Chinese!

Arabs — now they have cool printed fonts.

My friend is in the Sunday Globe Magazine

I’m beating chartouche to this post: her eldest sister Grace made the front-page article:

Grace (like wentsailing) plays a mean game of Warcraft III, making her husband Enoch a very lucky man.

Public Service Announcement: Basic Cooking Measurements

In the “Imperial” system:

3 teaspoons to a tablespoon
2 tablespoons to an ounce
8 ounces to a cup
2 cups to a pint
4 cups to a quart
4 quarts (as in quarter gallon) to a gallon
16 cups to a gallon

And for you Brits, Euros, and residents of the Great White North:

1 cubic centimeter = 1 milliliter
1000 milliliters = 1 liter = slightly more than a quart
1 cup = slightly less than 1/4 liter or 250 ml

And by weight:

1 liter of water = 1 kilogram = 2.2 pounds
1 pound = about 450 grams
1 gallon of water = about 4 liters = about 8 pounds
1 pint of water = 1/8 gallon = about 1 pound
1 cup of water = 1/2 pint = about 1/2 pound = about 8 ounces
so 8 ounces of water (volume) is about 8 ounces of water (weight)

From time to time I wonder what basic knowledge you need to be a decent cook.  Then I think, hey — these could be interview questions to judge food/cooking expertise.

Basic Chef Skills Question #1: how many cups to a gallon?

Advanced Chef Skills Question #1: describe the difference between spearmint and wintergreen.