http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/books/11/11/obit.chang.ap/

LOS GATOS, California (AP) — Iris Chang, a best-selling author who chronicled the Japanese occupation of China and the history of Chinese immigrants in the United States, was found dead in her car of a self-inflicted gunshot, authorities said Wednesday. She was 36.

Sadness beyond words…

Cool: Metros

Look in the upper left hand area of my xanga screen.  You’ll see a new line:

Metro: Boston

It’s like a blogring for geographical locations.  Cool!  The only downside is I feel very old when I look at the other Boston xangans out there.  Bummer.  “Am I twice your age or three times?”

The Brain Bandwagon

Hey, where did my other 18% go?  Are those the brain cells I killed in college?

One of the funnier scenes in The Matrix is when Neo gets a martial arts “download.”  He spasms around a bit, opens his eyes, and says in his inimitable way, “I know Kung Fu.” 

Real life is becoming more like that.  Over the past few days I have been voraciously learning about neural networks.  I just googled it and kept following links.  Now I feel like I have enough book larnin’ to begin trying some experiments for work.  Ten years ago – before the Internet was this big – it would have taken months to track down all this information.  Or taking a semester-long course.  Taking a class is like eating a 13-course meal, one week at a time.  Learning stuff yourself is like going into a jungle with your machete, hacking things apart and swallowing stuff whole.  Rar!

Legends of the Turducken

“Turducken is a turkey, stuffed with a duck, which in turn is stuffed with a chicken.”

Spirited discussion follows.  Not advised to read at work, unless your co-workers are used to hearing you laugh maniacally at your computer.

First Felony Spam Conviction

(AP)  A brother and sister who sent junk e-mail to millions of America Online customers were convicted Wednesday in the nation’s first felony prosecution of Internet spam distributors.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20041104/ap_on_bi_ge/spam_trial

Tonight I built a closet inside my storage room.  If I ever turn it into a second bedroom, I’ll put up a door or curtains blocking it off.  I kinda like the open look now, though.

Thoughts on Trinidad

In a few months I’ll be going to Trinidad.  Been there twice before.

The prison ministry is a big deal there.  A few years ago, we collected some money, enough to pay a full-time pastor to be there for a year.  Eventually that turned into a long-term program.  Lots of prisoners coming to Christ.  That’s cool.  But because we work with the pre-trial inmates, most are gone within a year.  So it’s a whole new crowd each year we visit.  No real lasting relationships.

The orphanage is a different matter.  They’re there long-term.  One of the boys there is named Clint.  The first year I went, he was about armpit-high.  The next year he was taller than me.  He’s introspective and mature for his age.  He was entranced by my Palm, so this year I’m going to give him my old one.  The orphanage has a new computer center from donations, but I don’t know if it’s in use.  I think they might be short on computer teachers.  I should look into that now before I go.  It would be cool to teach Clint and other kids how to use computers.  It could help them find jobs when they grow up and have to leave the orphanage.  I wonder if they have internet access there.  I also wonder if Clint will have problems keeping his Palm from being stolen.  A lot of kids there don’t own shoes, so that’s a weird disparity for one kid to own a PDA.  Should I bring shoes?  Bibles?  It’s kind of mind-boggling to think about.

> Should I serve in ministries where I am strong or weak?

Strong, because the ear shouldn’t envy the eye.  If the whole body were an eye, then where would the sense of hearing be?  God made each of us special and specialized, and we should use our specific gifts and talents to love and bless others.

Weak, because it can help show us areas of deficiency, baggage, and sin in our lives.  For example, in Trinidad I found it very hard to understand the locals.  That frustrated me because I couldn’t analyze and counsel them if I didn’t understand them.  Later I realized that I rely too much on my mental abilities to relate with people.  After all, being human is more than being able to understand them intellectually.

In the end, we should gravitate where we’re called.  Moses thought of himself as a terrible public speaker but was called to lead Israel.  Nehemiah knew he was gifted in administration, and used those gifts to the fullest when he felt called to rebuild the wall.  Apparently God has plans for us when he calls us to serve in areas of both strength and weakness.

Soda vs. Pop

Y’all ever wonder why your friends from other parts call it something different?

My Latest Addiction is blogs.salon.com

I guess it started with Real Live Preacher a few days ago.  Since then each night I’ve been reading a few more of his entries in reverse chronological order with a bit of link-following jumping around, like a Quentin Tarantino movie.  But invariably some of his links jump to other interesting bloggers.  Writers who make me… how do you say… “laugh out”?

Here is Matthew Sturges who writes a blog titled Correction.  I think he’s a pastor who’s considering seminary, another reverse-order from what we’re used to.

Today was the day that I had marked on my calendar to call and register for my fall seminary class over the phone. I had to call between the hours of 9:30 and 4:00. I never called. I watched the hours go by while I worked at my desk, and when 4:00 rolled by, I scrunched up my nose and stared off into space for a minute, and then I went back to work.

(because I can’t afford to, that’s why, even though my dad forwarded on to me his remnant of his late mother’s estate, which he further rounded up generously, and would have paid the tuition but not the books and when was I going to study for this class, exactly? and yes I know I probably could have found a way somehow to do it but I didn’t and it is too late and maybe I regret it and maybe I don’t. If you think I am lazy or a wimp for not taking this class then could you come and take care of my nine-month-old and pay my mortgage while I study? okthxbye.)

My therapist told me that I have to stop punishing myself for everything. And when she said that, I looked at her and said, without missing a beat, “But if I don’t do it, who will?

She didn’t think it was funny; therapists don’t appreciate that kind of humor. They’ll just look at you like they thought you were serious and say, “Well, that’s a good question. Who will punish you for the things you perceive as failures?”

I learned the hard way that you don’t want to answer this question by flippantly saying, “My father.” Not unless your idea of a good time is dredging up every negative encounter you and your dad ever shared.

“But I was just kidding,” you’ll say. And then you’ll get that exasperated look. And so on. And then you’ll have to tell the story about the time you got arrested for shoplifting.